Many things change once you become a parent, especially when you become a parent of a child with Autism Spectrum Disorder, one of the many things that may change are the holidays and how you celebrate and prepare for them. Thanksgiving can throw a child with autism into sensory overload with all the stimulation and routine change, visiting relative’s homes, or having a house full of guests along with the constant activity can often cause high anxiety and stress levels which can bring on meltdowns. Here is a list of tips that may help make your day a little easier and calmer for your child, you and your loved ones. No matter what, remember that Thanksgiving is a time for appreciation and giving thanks for all we have in our lives. I know sometimes we can get caught up in all the chaos of the therapies, doctors appointments, IEP meetings, research, schedules and such and that this journey can gave it's times of stress and frustration but take the time to remind your child why you are thankful for him or her and to remember all of the beautiful blessings that you have in life.
1. Prepare your child for the upcoming holiday. You can provide a schedule of events for the day and a visual/social story about the Thanksgiving holiday and festivities to help prepare your child for the day's events and routine changes. If your child responds better to pictures you can create a PECs schedule. Explain the general timeline what time guests will be coming/or when you will leave to relatives, what time dinner is, what time you plan on arriving at home.
2. While planning your day, keep your child's needs in mind. You may be looking forward to seeing family and friends and having a large get together. If this type of celebration is difficult for your child consider alternatives such as spending a portion of the day with quiet activities.
3. If friends and family are coming to your home, make sure your child’s room is off-limits. If you are visiting family or friends, talk to them beforehand about having a quiet, solitary space set aside for your child to escape to, if needed. Bring a few of your child's favorite toys, movies or books and spend a few minutes with your child in the space when you arrive, so she/he feels comfortable and knows where she/he can go if feeling overwhelmed.
4. If your child has a picky diey (or food adversions), food sensitivities or aversions to certain foods then bring some of your child's favorite foods.
5. If you are visiting or entertaining family your child doesn't see on a regular basis ask relatives to send you a digital picture if you don’t have any and make a photo album with name tags to help your child be more prepared for meeting relatives.
6. Some relatives don't understand Autism or your child, talk before hand about some of the behaviors your child may exhibit, triggers etc
7. If the festivities are at your home try to minimize the changes you make to your home. Rearrange furniture only if needed and use a few holiday decorations. The more that stays the same, the more your child will feel secure in their environment.
No one knows your child better than you, tailor holidays to make your child calm and relaxed. Holidays don't stop because you have a child with Autism, they just change a bit, overtime you and your family will find what works for your child and yourselves and embrace your new normal. Again, remember what this time of year is truly about, try to relax, prepare the best you can, go with the flow and enjoy yourselves and the time with your loved ones. So, here's to a safe and Happy Thanksgiving from our family to yours!
